Night Before.....

The night before...before the change of my life. As I begin this process of loosing the weight, I tend to think about the struggles that lies ahead for me. I know this process won't be easy and it won't be quick. I have basically doubled my size since I got out of high school, that was 18 years ago. Tomorrow I face my worst fears, needles!!! I've been promised that they don't hurt, so they better not, or someone is gonna get it, just kidding Jen.

I look forward to this change, this change is a positive in my life. I hope it can be a positive change for other family members as well. My mom and dad both need to lose weight, mom is in worst shape than I am, and I fear she will be gone before she makes any changes. She has promised to make the changes needed and have the authorization to go do the gastric by pass and has promised me that she will now concentrate on getting it done ASAP now that dad has finished his surgery. Healthwise, she needs the bypass over the weight loss plan I am doing, and has the go ahead from all her doctors to proceed with it. She has a doctor in Reno waiting to do her surgery, but has to lose 10% of weight (25 to 35 lbs) before she can have it done to help with fat surrounding her organs. She gets upset when someone tries to help her. She eats junk food like it's going out of style. She will not throw food away, every last ounce either has to be eaten or taken home. She gets real testy when someone tries to help. Tries to convince her that every morsel of food does not have to be eaten, that it is ok to throw things away. Her fridge is always full of uneaten food, that tends to get bad and gets tossed anyways. Good majority of it comes to me and my family to eat.

I have posted on facebook my plans for tomorrow and have had an out pouring of support as well one that was saying I was crazy for doing this. I found out in such a short time tonight how many people other than family, are out there to support me. I have had people I work with come out to support, I've had people I very seldom knew come to support me and offer encouragement. It almost brought tears to my eyes tonight to read what people have said to me and on facebook. I have had several people come to me in private saying I'm an inspiration to them, I've become someone they look up to, people I haven't even seen or known since high school. So on this journey has begun in a positive step forward, and if I can influence 1 person to get better with themselves, then my goal of this blog has met it's goal.